As disciples of Jesus, we've been called to follow him by claiming his example and learning from his teachings. From June to October, we're going to focus on the Gospel of Mark so that we might better understand how we might follow our Savior and live as his community.
Mark 7:24-37 [Contemporary English Version]
The woman replied, “Lord, even dogs eat the crumbs that children drop from the table.”
Jesus answered, “That’s true! You may go now. The demon has left your daughter.” When the woman got back home, she found her child lying on the bed. The demon had gone.
After Jesus had taken him aside from the crowd, he stuck his fingers in the man’s ears. Then he spit and put it on the man’s tongue. Jesus looked up toward heaven, and with a groan he said, “Effatha!” which means “Open up!” At once the man could hear, and he had no more trouble talking clearly.
Jesus told the people not to say anything about what he had done. But the more he told them, the more they talked about it. They were completely amazed and said, “Everything he does is good! He even heals people who cannot hear or talk.”
Beyond the First Impression
Well, I don’t know if you realize this, but this morning marks my two month anniversary at Sligo Presbyterian Church. And they said it wouldn’t last. And during our time together, I hope that y’all have gotten to know me a little better. But you know, it’s interesting, I’d bet a dollar to a donut that what you’ve learned has either reenforced or contradicted whatever first impression you had of me when I visited back in March and started here in June.
Of course, having a first impression, that’s just something we do all the time. In fact, I think it just sort of happens; right from the get/go, we start to form an opinion of someone by what we see and hear. Let me show you what I’m talking about. I want you to imagine that you have a twenty-year-old daughter who’s attending a large state university, whose colors are blue and gold. Anyway, she tells you that she has a new boyfriend whom she really wants you to do meet. And so, the next time you’re down near the university, you arrange to get together at a little restaurant near campus. And as you’re sitting there, in walks your daughter and with her new boy friend. Now, as a parent, what’s your first impression if the guy she walks in looks like this
or like this
or like this
[picture]. Now be honest, would you want any of them showing up for Thanksgiving dinner? Or would you loan any of them money? Or maybe most important of all, would you want to introduce any of them to a close personal friend as your new son-in-law? Now, you see what I mean by first impressions.
And for that reason, we’re going to spend some time talking about how we might get beyond our first impression. And to do that, we’re going to use the two little stories we read from the Gospel of Mark, you know, the one about the Syro-Phoenician woman and the guy Jesus met in a area called the Decapolis. You see, we’re going to look at what Jesus did and we’re going to apply it to ourselves. And I’ll tell you, when we do that, I think we’re going to find that we can get beyond our first impressions when we’re willing to do three very simple things that, according to Mark, Jesus also did.
And I want you to notice, that’s exactly what Jesus did in both the stories we read. You see, based on the little bit Mark told, there’s no way that either the unnamed woman or the unnamed man could have made a positive impression on Jesus or his disciples. I mean, for one, they were both from the wrong side of the tracks. You see, according to the Jews, humanity could be divided into two groups. On one hand, there were the Jews, you know, God chosen people, sort of like ancient Presbyterians. And on the other hand, you had everybody else, and they were called the Gentiles, in Greek, the ἔθνη, the nations. And I’ll tell you, every Jew knew that Gentiles, man, they were just no good. In fact, not only wouldn’t want your daughter to marry a Gentile, you couldn’t even have lunch with one. And since Mark wrote that “...the woman was Greek and had been born in the part of Syria known as Phoenicia” [Mark 7:26a, CEV] and since Mark also wrote that Jesus met the guy in the second story as “he went through the land near the ten cities known as Decapolis” [Mark 7:31b, CEV], I mean, since that happened, we can be confident that neither the woman nor the man were Jews. Now that’s one reason for Jesus to pass on by. And two, both the woman and the man had major problems, in fact, the kind of problems that folks believed must have been the result of sin. My gosh, just think about it. The woman had a daughter possessed by a demon for crying out loud, which shows some bad parenting, at least according to a first century Jew. And the man was deaf and mute. And so, there we have it, two foreigners with heavy spiritual package. Talk about a bad first impression! Not only could Jesus have walked right by them without anyone patting an eye, that’s exactly what the religious leaders would have expected a good Jew to do. But is that what Jesus did? No, instead he stopped, giving these two people who at first glace, possessed no redeeming qualities, the chance to approach him.
And you know, if we’re serious about getting beyond our first impressions, man, I think we need to be willing to do the same thing. You see, we can decide to take a break from what we’re doing or where we’re going, you know, to pause for just a little bit, so that we can offer those in front of us the chance to do something that people say is impossible to do, and I’m talking about giving folks a second chance to make a first impression. You see, when faced with men and women who trigger all kinds of assumptions and prejudices, we can simply chill before they start to shape our opinions and our behavior. I’m telling you, regardless of where we’re going or how fast we want to get there, we need to be willing to stop. And that’s the first thing we can do. But that’s not all.
And I’ll tell you, again, that’s exactly what Jesus did in the stories we just looked at. I mean, after he stopped, Jesus listened to the woman when “she begged [him] to force the demon out of her daughter.” [Mark 7:26b, CEV] And you know, even after “...Jesus said, ‘The children must first be fed! It isn’t right to take away their food and feed it to dogs,’” [Mark 7:27, CEV], he still was listening when “the woman replied, ‘Lord, even dogs eat the crumbs that children drop from the table.’” [Mark 7:28, CEV] You see, Jesus was listening to her, just like he listened when “some people brought to him a man who was deaf and could hardly talk [and] they begged Jesus just to touch him.” [Mark 7:32, CEV] In both cases, even though it would have been easy to tune these people out, Jesus was willing to listen.
And that’s something we can do as well. Of course, I’m talking about listening and not just hearing. I mean, give me a break, we can hear all kinds of stuff, you know, like the music playing as we’re shopping at the grocery store or the sound of traffic as we’re going to sleep or the voice of my wife telling me the five things she wants us to do before kick-off. I’ll tell you, hearing isn’t that hard, but to listen, that’s something else. I mean, to listen, we may need to put aside some of the things that we might consider really important and to focus our attention on the speaker and to take in the words without filtering them through all our assumptions and prejudices. Hearing sound is easy; listening to another person takes effort. But if we want to get past our initial perception and evaluation, in my opinion that’s the second thing we need to be willing to do.
And even though there was a change in both stories we read from Mark, I think the most dramatic was what happened with Jesus and the Syro-Phoenician woman. I mean, when he healed the man from the Decapolis, this act of compassion certainly represented a change for a any Jew. Still, I believe the change we see with Jesus in the first story is more personal and more powerful, at least it is for me. I mean, just think about what happened. This foreign women with a demon-possessed child approached Jesus, begging him to force a demon out of her daughter. But by his initial response, well, it sure seemed as though he’d pretty much determined that he wasn’t going to do it. Remember, “...Jesus said, ‘The children must first be fed! It isn’t right to take away their food and feed it to dogs.’” [Mark 7:27, CEV] Now that seems to be a pretty clear “no” to me. But then the woman did something remarkable. Instead of just shrugging her shoulders and going back to whatever awaited her at home, “the woman replied, ‘Lord, even dogs eat the crumbs that children drop from the table.’” [Mark 7:28, CEV] Now if we weren’t talking about Jesus, Christ, Son of God, after hearing what she said, I might be tempted to say, “Jesus, you just got burned.” But whether that was her intention or not, I don’t think it matters. You see, for me, what’s important is this:
Jesus answered, “That’s true! You may go now. The demon has left your daughter.” When the woman got back home, she found her child lying on the bed. The demon had gone. [Mark 7:29-30, CEV]
You see, in both cases, Jesus was willing to change, and he demonstrated that willingness by healing the deaf mute and by forcing the demon out of the child.
And as it relates to change, man, we can be willing to do that too. You see, after we’ve stopped and after we’ve listened without a lot of assumptions getting in the way, we can make the decision that we’re willing to change if that seems to be the right thing to do. Of course, I recognize that can be tricky, because if we’re not honest with ourselves and open to God, we can convince ourselves that following our impressions and assumptions and prejudices is right. And for that reason, as we consider whether or not we should change, I think we might want to keep in mind two lessons that Jesus taught. First, we might want to remember that, according to Matthew, he said, “God will be as hard on you as you are on others! He will treat you exactly as you treat them. You can see the speck in your friend’s eye, but you don’t notice the log in your own eye. How can you say, ‘My friend, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you don’t see the log in your own eye?” [Matthew 7:2-4, CEV] That’s one. And second, when asked about what commandment was greatest, “Jesus answered, ‘The most important one says: “People of Israel, you have only one Lord and God. You must love him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.” The second most important commandment says: “Love others as much as you love yourself.” No other commandment is more important than these.’” [Mark 12:29-31, CEV] In other words, as we consider whether or not to change our negative opinions and behavior, let’s err on the side of humility and love. And if we want to get beyond our first impressions, this is something we should be willing to do.
Of course, having said all this, I don’t want y’all to think that first impressions won’t continue to be important or that our impressions might not be spot on. For example, right now, this guy isn’t a doctor; instead, he’s in prison down in Louisiana. And this guy, well, he’s a real clown. And this guy, let’s just say he has issues. No, sometimes you can judge a book by its cover. But I think we all know, that’s not always the case. And so, before we just allow our initial insight to shape our opinions and behavior, let’s make the decision to move beyond our first impressions, knowing that doing that involves a willingness to stop and a willingness to listen and a willingness to change. And if that’s what we decide to do, who knows, we just might find something special, even in a guy with some genuine issues.
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